Sunday, May 31, 2009

We saw Terminator today.  It was alright.  Star Trek was definitely better, so was the Night at the Museum.  Mom fell asleep in the beginning because she was sitting still.  (She does this a lot - sit still for too long, and asleep she goes)  I nudge her a couple of times, then she woke up. We went to Olive Garden after.  That was good as usual.  We didn't go and work out today, I am in too much pain for that.  Maybe we will go tomorrow, but for sure on Tuesday.  We usually meet Katie there and work out together.  She is so fun to be around.  My arms ache like crazy today, I had a hard time paying attention to the movie.  Could be why I thought it was alright.  I didn't know that my arms were going to do this to me or I would have skipped the movie!  

At least Mom seemed to really like it.  She is very easy some days to entertain.  With her memory problem it is hard at times to find things she can do.  We tried playing games but she doesn't remember how to play them and explaining it doesn't do any good because she won't remember.  Movies and TV are good because she doesn't have to remember anything, and she knows right away if she likes it or not.  Sometimes she doesn't tell me that she doesn't like it, and then I get upset.  I try to be very patient with her.  She helps me a lot with things that I can't do.  If I tell her what to do as she is doing it, she can do things.  She also likes to be outside during nicer weather like we are having.  I think we will go for a walk(scooter).  It is really nice outside today.  Not like the rain the weatherman predicted!   

Tomorrow is the first day of June, already.  Although some times it seems like takes forever for the day to end.  I am getting better at living again instead of passing time.  Still have my bad days though.  I do think they are getting less and less.  They don't seem to last all day anymore, just mainly at night now.  If only my head would shut up sometimes!  But they don't do they?  If I get 6 more students (I am passing out flyers this week into the neighborhoods close by) Mom and I will be alright and we will not lose our house.  I think I should be able to get 6 more students, I am praying about that is for sure!  I wrote an article for our subdivision newsletter, so maybe I will get a couple of students that way.  Either way, the bottom line is I need 6 more or we will eventually lose the house or my car, or actually both.

I am off for a walk!  Enjoy the rest of your day!

Saturday, May 30, 2009

It is nice out today, not too hot, not too cold, just right for a scooter/walk with Mom.  I went to Barnes and Noble (one of my favorite stores) and bought a new book: Living well with Chronic Fatigue Syndrome and Fibromyalgia, it was published in 2004 so it's not that old.  So far it is the same as every other book on the subject, which means it doesn't have what I want in it.  I will finish it up tonight or tomorrow and then give my review of it.

I went to Heather's church on Thursday to meet the minister about possibly becoming their new worship leader.  I am not sure he thinks I am right for the job, although I am right for the pay because I would volunteer my time for it.  I will send him my resume and info and references and we shall see.  Their choir director also recently expressed interest although he isn't sure she was really interested.  the hold up on me is because I am not a rock and roller per se, although I love praise and worship music, I just don't have any experience teaching or leading that type of group.  However, I have directed choirs, ensembles, and plays for years, so we shall see.  

I am waiting on a few emails about my questionnaires I have sent out.  I am wondering about when I should send follow up emails about filling them out.  Both people said email would be the best.  I am almost done outlining the book and have begun the first chapter.  As my hands ache when I type too much, it takes me a while to write.  Plus, the brain fog interrupts the thought process.  Stupid brain fog.  There is new medicine coming out that is supposed to help brain fog.  I hope so.  It is keeping me from working! (Okay, so there are a lot of things keeping me from working - but that is the top of the list!)  I hope to go back to school and refresh on accounting and finish an accounting associates degree and get a job so I won't be on disability anymore.  This all depends on new therapies and medicine, but I am hopeful for them.

Off for my walk/scooter now.  Enjoy your day!!

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

It's raining on and off today so I couldn't go for a scooter/walk with Mom up to Tim Horton's.  Instead, we drove after I had my monthly blood test.  That didn't go as well as I hoped.  it took two tries, at least it was only twice, not four or five like before.  I'm feeling optimistic today about everything.  Must have something to do with the fact I could pay a few bills today, which always makes me feel better.  My friend, Heather, (I always laugh when I type that!) may have a job for me, not necessarily a paid position but it is for a church so it is okay.  Paid would be nice, but right now being a worship leader would be fun and give me something else that I like to do which is to sing!  Anytime to sing is great! Yeah!

Anyways, as you can see, it was a good day, not much in extra pain either, just the usual type.

Tuesday, May 26, 2009

Tuesday is exercise day.  It is the day we go to the gym.  I don't like it too much, but I know how important exercise is.  I spend about 40 minutes using the machines with Mom.  She loves it.  She looks forward to the three days we go to the gym.  At least it passes time with doing something important.  Mom and I walked to Tim Hortons again today.  It was a little cloudy, ready to rain, fortunately it didn't rain on us.  Especially because the scooter isn't supposed to get wet.  I have one student today, I thought three but one is rescheduled for Thursday, one I wrote down the wrong day, he comes tomorrow!  Silly me.  Brain fog!  It gets in the way a lot, I can't remember half the things I used to remember.  Oh well, what can I say?  

Monday, May 25, 2009

I have to admit, the one big challenge I have right now is the acceptance of not being well enough to work.  I have always worked from the time I was 18 until last September.  After I lost the store, it became apparent to me that I wasn't well enough to work.  I had been in and out of the hospital about 12 times in the last year, and it wasn't looking good.  I am on disability now, but I feel so much better than last year.  That could be because I have rested a lot since september and the stress of the store is over.  I am awake for more hours than I was in the fall, about 10 hours a day, as opposed to the 8 hours a day then.  I don't have much stress in my life now, which is good.  However, I do envy people that can work, and I know that is not good.  I want to work, just like most people.  I am working on the accepting that right now I can't, but that doesn't mean that in the future I will not be able to join the work force.  Who knows what the future will bring.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Today was a great day.  Mom and I went to see Night of the Museum.  It was really good.  I never saw the first one so I wasn't sure if I would like it, but I did.  After that we went out to Olive Garden for dinner.  It was good as usual.

Last thursday I had my first two interviews.  They went well.  Since one of them was my friend, I already knew the answers to some of the questions.  I have email the questions to two more people.  I hope to begin the actual writing soon.  I figure after a couple of more interviews, then I shall have the begins of a new book.  I'm actually very excited about, something I haven't felt since last August when I lost my store.  I don't feel too bad about that anymore, I know that the economy had more to do with the failing of the store than anything.  No customers - no store, quite simple actually.  I haven't done much since then, except rest, rest, and more rest!  I am now tired of resting.  So I am now busy with this new project!  More details soon!
My newest project is writing about life and fibromyalgia.  I am interviewing people I know (and hopefully soon - those I don't) about how they live with fibromyalgia, how they get through their bad days.  I figure because it is such a individual illness that we can help each other, what works for one may work for another.  It can't help to learn more about how others live, not just survive, but live.  I have fibromyalgia and currently am on disability because I can no longer work.  It has been a difficult adjustment for me.