Wednesday, September 30, 2009

We went grocery shopping this afternoon.  I feel like I have run several major marathons.  I also, naturally, in the middle of shopping, managed to hit my hand which jammed my sore shoulder on the door of the frozen foods.  Yup, wasn't that the brightest thing to do?  I amaze myself sometimes.  I am so clumsy.  So my arm is even more sore than it was before I started out this afternoon.  My shoulder is just as sore and of course, my knee and head have to keep them company.  Sometimes I just want to scream.  This is one of those days.

Other than shopping, there isn't much to do today, no lessons.  It is a good thing though since we went shopping.  I usually go on days we don't have much planned because it takes so much out of me.  

The weather is turning a bit colder now and the leaves are starting to change.  It looks so pretty from our dining room window.  We are heading to the bank now to make a deposit so my health insurance doesn't bounce.  

Hope you are having a good day.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

I finished altering Emily's dress.  It was okay until I had to stand to measure the hem.  That hurt a bit.  I haven't sewn much in a year since I made the dresses for Disney.  I did okay, I am happy with most of the changes.

I have one student left tonight.  She is on her way.  Frank was back for his lesson this afternoon.  It was great to see and hear him again.  He has been off for 7 weeks since he broke his wrist.  He played quite well for not playing for 7 weeks.  He did practice this week though.  Charlie did well too.  Both boys have homecoming this weekend and are going.  (they attend different schools)

My arm and shoulder are very sore again, I have an appointment to see my doctor in two weeks.  I didn't ask for the appointment, apparently I haven't been in for an appointment for a year so he wants to see me.  I will have him look at my arm and shoulder although I believe it is just fibro.  We shall see.  My knee will be checked out too.  The left one is not doing as well as I would like.  I don't see the rheumatologist until October some time, so that is soon.

It is dark now so we won't be going to scooter.  It gets darker earlier now so we are probably done scootering until spring unless we go on the weekends.

I hope to pass out more flyers this week since I can't pass them out at the schools.  They don't allow it.  I was very disappointed at that.  Well, Rachel should be here soon, so have a good evening!!

Monday, September 28, 2009

I have 4 students today.  I also got a call back from the school board person, they will not allow me to pass out flyers to the elementary school for lessons.  They don't allow anyone to do that.  They just can't endorse anyone.  I wonder where our world has gone to.  It is really annoying.  So we are back to passing out flyers door to door.  I haven't had any results yet from that method.  I can't afford to put an ad in the newspaper because it costs about $500 per week.  Oh well, I have people that are willing to help me pass out flyers.  Maybe I will get someone that way.  At least I have two new students this fall. 

My arm and shoulder are doing worse.  My student is here so I have to go!  Have a great day!

Sunday, September 27, 2009

Sam was over this morning to see if her homecoming dress needed to adjusted.  It doesn't.  She wanted a ruffle changed but that would ruin the line of the dress as well the entire dress would have to taken apart and resewn.  So I told her it was not possible to do.  (Because I am not ruining a dress!)  She plans to wear tights on her legs, a tank top underneath the dress (it will show) and converse tennis shoes on her feet.  Yeah.  She will basically be inappropriately dressed.  If it were my daughter she would not be going unless she was appropriately dressed meaning: black nylons on her legs with dress shoes and no tank top.  But she isn't my kid, so I guess her grandmother will let her go out looking like that.  I tried to talk her out of the shoes, but she won't budge.  Her grandmother was trying to tell her she should wear dress shoes but she was laughing so the effect she wanted wasn't there.  I just don't think it's funny.  She is going to embarrass herself.  

I will be fixing Emily's dress today.  She came over yesterday for the fitting.  I want her to come back during the week in case it needs to be adjusted again.  I don't think it will, but better to be safe than sorry.

I have to do laundry today too.  I am running out of undies.  Laundry is hard for me because I can't reach everything in the washer to put in the dryer and I can't stand up long enough to fold things out of the dryer, so Mom helps.  She brings down the clothes and then puts them in the dryer for me.  I hate doing laundry.  Then again, I don't know anyone who loves it.

My cousin and family are in Disney World right now, so is one of my friends.  I hope they have a great time.  I love Disney!!!!!!  I have been there about 13 times so far in my life.  I hope to go again in 2 years with Kathy and her children.  I had to give up my Disney points because we can't afford them anymore.  I was really sad over that.  I tried so hard to hang on to them.  We just don't have enough money unless I win the lottery.  Which, hey, you never know, it could happen.  Boy would I be shocked if it did.  

I am not sure if we are going to scooter today.  We will see how I feel after sewing.

Have a great afternoon and enjoy fall!

Saturday, September 26, 2009

I ache a lot tonight.  My arm has been pretty bad all day.  Despite that, it was a good day.  I had two lessons then book club.  It was a great book club.  We were discussing so many things as well as the book we read.  I love book club.  It is always an interesting conversation with all the topics we hit upon.

After book club Emily came over to try on her dress so I can take the top in.  The bones in the dress stick out too much and well, a taller person would get a show.  Not good.  She has had a bad week with her asthma.  She has life threatening asthma and had been in the emergency room as well as the doctors office.  Poor kid.  She hasn't slept well because of the medicine she is taking.  What she needs is a really good night sleep but at this point she is so over tired that she can't sleep.  I hope this week is better for her.  She is a really nice kid.  I have known her since she was 6, wow, it has been 10 years, I just realized that.  Her sister is one of my students, Emily was, but she has advanced in piano so much that I couldn't teach her anymore.

I just love the day I had today!!!!  It was wonderful despite the major pain.  Tomorrow should be a busy day too as I plan to work on Emily's dress and Aggie's dress.  Then Emily will come in the middle of the week to try on the dress again to see how it fits.

I hope this finds you having a good day and enjoying fall.  It is my favorite season.

Friday, September 25, 2009

I am in a lot of pain today.  My shoulder and arm are really burning.  I am most unhappy about that.  It was difficult going to the sewing class because it hurt so much, but the girls are very helpful and listen quite well.  It is just not my day.  Mom gets upset because there isn't anything she can do to help.  I am trying not to move the arm much so it won't hurt so much.

Not much more happening as I feel horrible and am in a lot of pain.  

I didn't have Roman for a lesson yesterday.  His mom called to cancel the lesson at about 4 pm.  I was very disappointed because I was looking forward to the lesson,   She is new so I wasn't too angry about the late notice.  It does happen.

I have two lessons tomorrow morning and early afternoon as well as book club so I am looking forward to that.

I hope I have a better day tomorrow and in less pain.  I will be heading for bed early tonight and we won't be scootering.  I hope your day is much better than I.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

I had my blood test this morning.  She had to poke me twice because the first time it didn't work.  I have very deep veins.  I also got my flu shot too, so did Mom.  She wasn't very happy with me about that, but oh well, she needed one.  My arm hurts even worse than usual because of the shot.  I should have had her give it to me in the right arm, not the left but she did it so fast it didn't occur to me how much it would hurt afterwards.  I hope it will be a month before the next one.

My arm and shoulder hurt a lot right now.  I think I finally fell asleep about 4 am. I hurt so much that I couldn't sleep.  My right eye is sore too.  It isn't fair.  That's all I have to say about it.

My friend, Donna, got lucky.  Her doctor is going to be able to give her the medicine as an outpatient.  He said it would be alright to do as long she remembers to give herself the medicine four times a day.  I still think she should be in a hospital where she will be supervised with the medicine.

I have little Roman tonight.  He is so cute.  He is four.  He is doing alright for a 4 year old.

I hope this finds you doing well.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

I had no students tonight.  I had one yesterday, Charlie.  Frank will be back next week.  He broke his wrist about 6 weeks ago so he hasn't had a lesson since.  He got his cast off yesterday, so he will have his lesson next week.  I am very happy about that.  I talked to the a school board's secretary this afternoon.  I had to send a copy of my flyer that I would like to pass out to the local elementary schools.  I don't know if they will allow it, I hope so.  It would really help me out if I can pass them out to the school children.  I know that Rochester schools doesn't allow it because they have their own after school program.  I think Utica has one too, but I asked anyway.  I hope to hear from her soon.

My friend, Donna has a rare bone infection.  Apparently it is really bad and she has been told she needs to be in the hospital.  She refuses to go, says she can't afford it and won't do it.  She told the doctor to treat her as an outpatient.  To me, she is signing her own death warrant.  I don't understand her at all.  She has been told that if she doesn't get the medicine, she will die.  I don't get it, she is going to die if she doesn't go into the hospital, but she won't do it.  Her husband basically is like, that is her problem.  She had an appointment this afternoon.  She said she would call me later.

Pain level is medium high right now, but was really high this morning.  My shoulder is not getting any better and at times, is worse.  I wake up more than usual with pain, and then it takes a little bit to go back to sleep.  I woke up late today and am very tired.

I hope this finds you doing well.

Monday, September 21, 2009

I had four students today!  Yeah!  It was a great day.  I love days that I have a lot of students.  It makes the day.  My hope is that by the end of October, I will have 4 students Monday thru Thursday, and Saturday.  That would be good.  I can handle 4 a day.  I think I can actually handle 6 a day, but I will begin with 4.  I am going to go to the elementary school and ask if they will pass out my flyers.  I don't think they will, but I am going to ask anyway, they can only say no.  Saturday is book club and that is the day the Muglia girls were coming to pass out flyers, I will have to see if they can come a different day because of book club.  We only meet once a month.  But if I can pass them out at the school, I won't need to pass anymore out!  We shall see.

Mom enjoyed going to the first student's lesson.  She listens instead of doing her puzzles.  She likes to watch the students have their lessons.  She sits in on Kayla's and Rachel's lessons too.  Actually, I think she watches almost all of the lessons.  Grace had her first voice lesson this afternoon.  She did quite well for the first lesson.  Bob did okay on piano, he was having trouble with a few passages of his pieces that we went over and he did better on them.  I am very pleased with how he is improving on the piano.

I have to go to Evola's to sign up for the Christmas concert.  I want it the third Saturday or Sunday in December.  The first two weekends are busy for a couple of the students and they don't want to miss the concert, so we are going this week.

It is rainyish out right now so we are not going out for a scooter and it is also very humid out.  I don't do well with the humidity.

I am still waiting for my back disability.  I hope it comes soon.  I need to pay for the bankruptcy so I can get that taken care of.  Then we can work on Mom's bankruptcy.  Houses right now are being sold for almost half of what they are worth (the tax rate worth)  This will help Mom and I for the bankruptcy so I am not upset over that.  We just need to get them taken care of and finished.

Richard should be finishing up his contract work this month and then he, too, will be unemployed again.  I hope he finds another job either full time or another contract job soon.  He has a family to take care of too.  I wrote Abby and William last week, they should have the letter by now.  Hope they liked the card I made them for school.

Pain level is medium today.  I have been very careful not to move the shoulder wrong and cause severe pain through out the shoulder and arm.  I need help putting on my jacket so Mom helps me otherwise I can't put it on by myself.  One more thing I can't do on my own.  Just add it to the list.

I hope this finds you doing well and having a good day.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

We met our friend Donna for Tim Horton's today.  It was fun.  She is a very nice lady.  She also has a rare bone infection that she should really be in the hospital for but she won't go because she can't afford to pay what her insurance won't pay for.  Her husband has the money to pay but he won't.  He says that is her responsibility.  I think that sucks the big one.  I thought when you got married you shared everything including money.  I guess he doesn't care that she could die from this.  I don't understand their marriage at all.  Unfortunately she can't leave him because she has no money and no where to go.  Her son and granddaughter live with them.  It just makes me mad!

We spent about 2 1/2 hours at the restaurant drinking pop (me), hot chocolate (Mom), and coffee (Donna).  It is nice to pass the time with a friend.  Now we are home and both Mom and I are bored again.  I am going to put on Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman.  Mom really likes the show and it keeps her from falling asleep her at the table.

I am very tired today and my arm/shoulder is very sore.  I moved it wrong putting on my jacket and it let me know.

I had one lesson earlier and she did wonderful.  We were working on something new and she hit notes she didn't know she could hit clearly.  She about fell over, Katie asked, "what was that?"  I replied, "You."  She was very shocked at the sound that came out of her mouth.  It was really exciting because it gives a glimpse of what she will be able to do soon and that is so cool.

I don't know if we are going to scooter, I have to charge it, I don't think we would get very far on it tonight.  

I hope this finds you doing well and enjoying your day!

Saturday, September 19, 2009

I had one lesson today and that was it.  Aggie is every other week so this was her off week.  I have one student tomorrow and then 4 on Monday.  I love Mondays with that many students!

Not much going on here, I am re-reading Harry Potter and the Order of Phoenix for I have no idea how many times.  We probably will watch Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman sometime later tonight.  Weekends are so boring.  Then again, weekdays aren't much better either.  Next Saturday the Muglia girls are going to come and pass out flyers.  That will be fun.  They are very busy today.  The girls are so unhappy that school has started.  Right now school doesn't sound so bad at least there is something to do.  But I do totally understand them, I hated school too.  Unfortunately, I wasn't homeschooled like they are.  I would have liked that better.

My arm is not doing well at all.  I cannot get my jacket on without help anymore because I can't really move the arm up now without massive pain.  My knee is doing somewhat better, it isn't as bad as it was earlier in the week.

I am very tired today.  I slept in too, so I shouldn't be so tired, but I am.  

I hope you are having a good day.

Friday, September 18, 2009

It was sewing day with the Muglia girls!  Hannah picked out her pattern and her material for her top to her skirt.  She picked the easiest one.  Hers is very straight forward and not complicated like her sisters.  I also picked up my sewing machine from the repair person.  $144.06 later, I have a machine that works.  It better because the repair was so expensive.  It is nice out, sunny and little cool.  I am happy about that.  We barely had the air conditioner on this summer so that saved on money.  We are still behind in bills though and I am still waiting for my back disability to arrive.  I hope it comes soon, we really need it to catch up on house bills.  

Not much going on her in the Paxton house tonight.  I am very tired because I didn't get enough sleep last night.  Mom fell asleep before I was ready for bed and I was reading so I didn't realize how late it was.  I finally went in her room at 11:30 pm and saw her lying in bed.  I had to wake her up to get my pajamas on because with my arm so bad I can't get them on myself.  Tonight I will make sure I am ready before she is, then it won't happen again.  She said she was so tired she just went to bed forgetting about me.  First time that has ever happened.

I have one lesson tomorrow, Lily.  She moved her lesson time from 11 am to 1 pm.  She had to move her lesson last week because Emily came to the lesson to try on her homecoming dress that I am shortening for her.  Lily liked sleeping in so asked if she could have her lesson at 1 pm every week.  I said no problem!  And it isn't.  Whatever works for Lily, works for me.  I live to teach.  Her mom at first was worried that it would break up my day, I said no problem.  Whatever the kid wants works for me.

We aren't going out to scooter because we are both pooped.  We're just too tired to go so we will go tomorrow instead.

I hope this finds you doing well and enjoying your day.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

We went to the IMAX to see Harry Potter, it is the third time we have seen the movie.  It is a good movie and I didn't want to be home today.  I don't really know why, sometimes I just don't like to be home.  I think we are here way way way too much without enough to do.

I have one student this evening, little Roman so that is a good thing.  The new season of Oprah is on, I haven't seen one yet and they started on Monday.  I was teaching during the time on Monday and Tuesday and yesterday we went to the Olive Garden for their never ending pasta bowls (mind you one totally fills you up!!!!)  It was an alright day since I had no students. 

I haven't heard anything from anyone I passed out flyers too.  I am pretty disappointed about that.  We all know what will happen if I don't get new students soon.  I am trying not to focus on that.  Maybe that is what God wants Mom and I to do, live with Richard, but I don't know.  You know, a little more information from up above would be really helpful, I have never been able to figure out things unless they are direct.

It will be too late when I finish my lesson to go for a scooter so we will go tomorrow.  I hope this finds you doing well and having a good day.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Not much to do now, we went to get our passport pictures taken.  Oh my, you can't smile in them or the passport people will send them back so we look horrible in the pictures.  I don't understand why you can't smile - must have a neutral expression - okay whatever!!!!!!!  Then we went to the bank to get an international money order, only the banks don't have them anymore.  Yeah, tell me how that makes perfect sense!  They have absolutely no way to send money to Canada that can actually be cashed, no international anything.  I couldn't believe it.  I hope mom's debit visa card comes in the mail real fast.  We need it before the end of the month.  The teller just looked at me funny and was like go to Canada for one.  this was after I told her it was for my passport application.  what a dip!  Sure, go to Canada, wait for your passport to be sent to our American home meanwhile we are stuck in Canada because you need a passport to get in the USA!  What brains!  Does she sit on them or what?  Some people!

Anyways, other than that beautiful experience, not much else going on as I have no students today.  I have one tomorrow, the little guy.  The Muglia girls will be helping me pass out more flyers.  I haven't had any answer to any of the ones I have sent out yet.  I hope we hear something soon because you know what will happen.  Besides, I need something to do!  It is really boring here.  I know most of you have no idea what that is like and it probably sounds fun, but when you don't have enough to do, you ache more because you can think about it more.  When I am busy, I don't ache as much because we are too busy!

Speaking of aching, my shoulder is not doing well right now.  It hurts all night long even when I am not sleeping on that side so sleep is getting more difficult than usual.  The knee is just stiff, not sore unless I am trying to straighten it after sitting.

I think we are going to see Harry Potter again today.  We need some good flicks!  I hope this finds you having a decent day!

Tuesday, September 15, 2009

Mom is obsessed with toothbrushes now.  I mean on what to do with them when they are not in use.  She has to wrap them in paper towels, which I hate.  She also can not leave them on the counter which is the best place for them.  She hid my toothbrush again this morning.  I wish she would just leave them alone.  She has since found my toothbrush and toothpaste but couldn't put them on the counter in the bathroom, she is still holding hers because, oh my, can't leave it where it does the most good.  Oh no, must wrap and hide it.  It wouldn't be so bad if she just wrapped it, but she has so many stupid pieces of paper towel on her dresser that you can no longer see the dresser.  it is a fire hazard and she is paranoid of fire.  I can't get her to remove the paper from her room even though she cries about fire.  It is so frustrating!  I am ready to scream about it.  I can't get her to throw away any of the paper that would so make her room cleaner.  She hordes it.  That is not a very good thing to do.  Our entire house is filled with stupid paper that she won't let me throw away.  So I try to throw some away when she's not looking.  But this toothbrush thing!!!

Pain level has been high since last night.  My arm is very sore and my knee extremely stiff.  It is very annoying, and since I am in an annoying mood, it makes my mood worse.

I have one student today, I am glad about that!  Charlie will be here in a while for his lesson.  The Muglia girls are going to sew on Friday and then let me know when they can pass out flyers.  I hope to finish passing them out by next week and hopefully will get some calls.  I haven't heard anything since I first passed them out.  Not good news there.

I hope your day is better than mine.

Monday, September 14, 2009

I had a new student this afternoon.  Her name is Grace and she is 15.  She will be taking piano and voice, but because the books weren't in when she went to get them and was told it would take weeks for them to come in, we only did piano which worked well.  She also has her first writing assignment.  I have two more lessons today, Bob is on vacation in Myrtle Beach, but Kayla and Rachel will be here so I am a happy camper today.  I also have my fibro meeting tonight, but I don't think I am going to go because it is a speaker on disability and I already have disability.

I didn't get the nap I wanted yesterday, Mom kept coming in my room every 3 to 5 minutes to see where I was.  I finally just got up after a half hour.  It wasn't worth it.  I tried to even have her sit in my room.  She just hates to be downstairs by herself, I don't know why.  It would be peace and quiet for her but she hates it.  She is afraid to be downstairs without me.  She is actually afraid to be anywhere without me.  She comes everywhere, and I mean everywhere with me.  She would rather sleep in my room too, but fortunately there isn't enough room in my room or in my bed for her.  So she has to sleep in hers.  I am glad for that.  I don't want to share a room with her.  She sleeps with the light on now and I wouldn't be able to sleep at all like that.

My knee is very stiff now, it has gotten stiffer in the last few days, it doesn't hurt so much as it is difficult to straighten or bend depending on what I need it to do.  Annoying knee.  I can only sleep on one side now in my bed because of the arm and the back.  Difficult to sleep now.  I am more tired than I was.  My arm is okay today, right now but by nighttime it will be painful, I just took a pain pill about an hour ago so it has kicked in.

Mom is too hot to go for a scooter tonight so we won't be going, plus I haven't fully decided whether or not to go to the meeting.  We'll see.  The only reason I think I might, is Robin still has some of my music and I may get it back tonight.  Maybe I will make plans to have lunch with her.

Have a good evening!!!!

Sunday, September 13, 2009

I am now exhausted and ready for bed.  Yup, it is 4:15pm and I am ready for bed.  Katie and I passed out 100 flyers and then Mom and I went to Tim Hortons for lunch and it wiped me out.  I have asked another Katie if she will help with the rest of the flyers, as I have about 300 more to pass out.  Rachel is supposed to let me know tomorrow her schedule and to see when she can help.  I haven't heard from anyone would has gotten the flyers yet.  I am hoping for 18 new students.  I may need to pass out more flyers after I finish the 300 that are left.  

Not much happening this afternoon now.  I have a new student tomorrow so I will be glad about that.  She is 15 and is taking both piano and voice.  I have never done both in 45 minutes before so we shall see how that works.  As long as she does what she is supposed to  it should work out okay.  Better than having piano one week and voice the next.  

I think I will go and lay down now, I am falling asleep here while I am typing.  Not a good idea!

Have a good night!

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Emily was here today with her homecoming dress, I am going to be hemming it.  It's about 6 inches too long.  She is just a tiny little thing.  Not much to her at all.  A perfect size 2.  Yup, I said size 2.  She is only sixteen after all.  Another friend of mine's granddaughter just got her homecoming dress.  It isn't as formal as Emily's, but her crowd is more casual than Emily's.  

Lily and Aggie both had their lessons today.  Aggie is a sophomore at MSU and Lily is a sixth grader.  She is also Emily's little sister.  Both are doing well, Lily finished two songs and started a new one.  One of the older girls wants to sing a duet with Lily.  They'll sound nice together.  

Katie is coming over tomorrow to help pass out flyers.  We going to the neighborhood at the top of my street.  Should take a few hours to pass out about 100 of  them.  I am waiting for Rachel to let me know when she can come and help me.  Her schedule is rather crazy with school and cross country running.  Both Rachel and Katie are 16 and are junior in high school.  Katie is also in a program for homeschoolers at the local community college.  She is enjoying it.

Pain is medium right now.  My knee is very sore and stiff but my arm and shoulder are medium, so I guess only half is medium and the other is high.  My head is medium too.  I didn't get much sleep last night, I couldn't sleep so I got up and started reading.  I have been rereading all the Harry Potter books, I am on book 3 again.  I love those books.  I know I have other books to read, but, well, when I am not feeling well I want an old friend to read like Harry Potter and pals.  Maggie loaned me next month's book club book.  I started it the other day, seems to be good.  I will finish it before book club so Katie can borrow it from Maggie and then Aggie can read it.  I hope Jessie and the other Katie can come to book club.  I passed the info to them so I hope they are reading the book.  It was a great one.  It was Kristin Chenoweth's autobiography.  It was so funny and light hearted to read.  She has had an amazing career and it is so nice to read about someone who loves her family, all of them, especially Mom and Dad.  I really liked that about her.

So far I have not had a repeat episode of light headiness, so I guess it was just a freak thing.  Mom was upset that I didn't wake her up during it.  Why would I?  What could she do?  She said next time wake her.  Alright, I will but there isn't anything she can do except maybe help me to the bathroom better, I did hobble to it and back to bed alright though.

My friend from high school, Jennie, had her 4th child yesterday.  How exciting!  A new baby!  She just had the baby and posted it to facebook.  I think she is as addicted to facebook as the rest of us are.  I am glad that both she and the baby are fine.  She named the new little one Mary Isabella.  Isn't that a pretty name?  I think so.  Second baby Mary I know now.  Mary Therese Muglia and now Mary Isabella Ross.  Babies are so nice and give the world such hope.

I bought Mom two new pairs of jeans this afternoon.  First time in years that I have been able to get her jeans.  They will actually fit instead of being 3 sizes too big.  No more upsets in the morning about where her belt is because she won't need it!  Yeah!  I am sooooo glad she FINALLY let me get her some new ones.  They were on sale too.  A bonus.

Well, this has been a bit of a longish post so I will end now.  I hope this finds you doing alright and ready for fall.  My favorite season of the year.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Hard to believe it has been 8 years since 9/11.  To have that many people purposely killed.  It just boggles the mind on how human beings want to kill each other just because of where they live, or what they believe.  To think we have enemies based on our personal beliefs is so hard for me to believe.  How can someone hate me because I have different beliefs than they do?  I don't think I will ever understand that kind of hatred, never ever.

Sleep was a smidge better last night.  Mom kept coming in my room though asking me if I was ready to get up.  She gets so bored in the morning but I have such poor sleep that if I get up earlier I will end taking a long nap in the afternoon.  I don't think she would be happy about that either.  I have come to the realization that no matter what I do, unless I move my schedule to hers, she will not be happy.  The chances of me being able to move her schedule is close to zip because I just don't sleep well.  Wait, if I can get decent sleep I would be able to.  I don't expect good sleep anymore.  I expect a bad nights sleep every night.  I am excited about a better night sleep, not a good night sleep.

My arm and head are not doing well right now.  I have taken a pain pill so I hope it improves soon.  My left knee is bad again.  I don't know why it is sore, I didn't do anything to it.  At least I don't remember doing anything to it.  Sometimes it feels like it is about to give out on me.  I haven't had any light headiness since the other night so I am very happy about that.  We will probably go to bed earlier tonight since I am so tired.  With Mom interrupting me all morning, I didn't get the same amount sleep as usual.  Every time I rolled over she was in the room.

We went to see All About Steve this afternoon.  What a strange movie.  I am not sure if I liked it or not.  It was billed as a comedy yet parts were definitely not funny.  The main character, Mary, falling into an abandoned mine is not funny, nor is the fact that the children who were originally in the mine one was left behind.  Yes, she figured out a way to get out and save them, but still, it is not funny.  It was definitely not as good as the Proposal.  That was a great movie!  I loved that one, it was so funny.  Mom wasn't sure if she liked the one we saw today or not and that is unusual for her.  She generally likes almost everything.  That is just Mom, but today she can't make up her mind.

Well, I hope you are doing well.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

I woke up at about 3am this morning completely light headed and dizzy.  I have not had this happen before.  I was a little light headed the other night, but that quickly went away.  When I woke up again, it was gone.  (thank God for that!!!!)  My knee also was ready to give out on me, another new thing.  I often wonder why these things happen at night?  Why not during the day when you can call a doctor and go in?  No, of course not, they happen at night when nobody is in their office.  I almost had to call for help from Mom to get to the bathroom, but I managed to hobble to it.  I must of looked very funny though.  Trying to walk with a leg that is not behaving and my head spinning around.

I have a new little guy tonight.  He is four and very excited about music.  My favorite kind!  I am looking forward to this lesson.  I have to wait until 6:30 for the lesson.  Jennifer (the Mom) got my name from the gym's community board.  At least something good came out of the gym.  We had to stop going because we can't pay for it.  It is just too expensive right now.  How it works  is that the membership is free but you still have to pay for maintenance fees and you have to pay them all up front.  yeah, so much for a free membership.  It just got too expensive for us with the rest of the bills we have to pay.

Not much else going on here.  Mom is falling asleep in her chair at the dining room table again.  she does this often since when she sits still she falls asleep easily.  It looks rather funny.  I don't know if we are going to go for a scooter later tonight, depends on how I feel after the lesson.  I am falling asleep at the table here myself, so I think I will sign off and go take a nap.  I have plenty of time before the lesson to take one.  I hope by the end of the month, I will have an average of 4 or so students a night, more would be nice, but I am aiming for 4.

Have a great afternoon!

Wednesday, September 9, 2009

Pain level is high right now.  My shoulder and arm are basically on fire.  Or so it feels to me.  My chest is sore today to.  I have taken a pain pill so I hope it kicks in fast.  I notice I am a bit grumpier when pain level is higher.  Mom is too understanding at times.  She just lets it roll right off her if I am grumpy to her.  I should be glad about that but for some reason today it bugs me.  Must be the grumpy butt in me.  I am at least waking up a bit.  I was soooooo tired earlier.  I also was grumpy because I called Donna twice and she didn't answer.  I know, she was on the other line, but you know grumpies!

Mom is bored again, she gets bored rather easy and she is difficult to entertain since she can't remember how to do anything.  We aren't watching TV like usual because they (Hallmark channel) took off my 7th Heaven.  I love that show.  They put Little House on the Prairie back on it its place, I like that show too but I have seen too much of it lately so we aren't watching anything.

I have one student after all today, Bob is making up his lesson that he missed on Monday.  I am very happy about that.  A lesson!!  yeah!  I have my new little guy tomorrow.  He is four and his name is Roman.  He likes to sing too.  A little young for singing lessons, but in a group he would be fine.  I hope to have enough kids to form a little group to sing at the Christmas concert.  I am going to be searching for Christmas music soon, I know hard to believe it is that time of year again.

We have a subdivision meeting tonight so we won't be scootering, also it doesn't look to good out.  I hope this finds you having a good day and enjoying fall.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

Rainy day today.   Not that I really mind.  We need the rain to make the garden (okay - so ours are full of weeds!) grow.  Kids started school this morning.  Fall is here.  My favorite season.  I had my usual blood test this afternoon.  Only took one time!  Woohoo!  I was very happy about that.  I hate it when they have to take more than one time.  I can clear a room of nurses by just walking in.  Amazing how fast I can do that, it can be comical at times.

Pain is medium for the arm and shoulder but my chest is not doing well.  It aches horribly.  It is making it a bit difficult to breathe properly.  My jaw is also sore tonight.  I hope it ends soon.

No students today, I hope to hear from Bob so we can reschedule his lesson.  I have no lessons tomorrow either because the Muglia family is ill so no sewing.  We have a subdivision meeting tomorrow night.  I am on the board.  It can be interesting.  We have had some problems in the sub this summer, someone tried to steal a car in the courts and some cars were broken into.  Our car was egged.  Not a pretty sight.  

We won't be going out tonight, I am just not feeling up to it.  I probably will watch TV and play with my Nintendo DS lite.  I love that thing.  It is very addicting.  I hope this finds you having a good day and enjoying the first day of schools for your little ones if you are lucky enough to have some!

Monday, September 7, 2009

I had 4 students today, I was supposed to have 6, but Peter was sick at the Muglia's and Bob will be rescheduling for later this week, so that brought the number down to 4.  I am still happy I had 4!  I won't have the Muglia's for lessons again until next month.  They can only have lessons once a month - at least they still have lessons.

After Kayla's lesson we went to the Olive Garden.  I learned what noodles Mom actually likes the best, I thought it was fettuccine, but it is the penne noodles.  Hmm, even after all this time, I learn something new.  We are now watching a Golden Girls marathon.  Not much else going on tonight.  I don't have any lessons tomorrow because Charlie will be having a marching band practice that normally is on Monday, but because today is Labor Day, they will have practice Tuesday, the day of his lesson.  Frank will be absent again, I think we have 3 more weeks of absences from Frank from his cracked wrist.  I wonder how he is doing.  I haven't heard from him at all (not that I really expected too).  Tomorrow is the first day of school for all students.  I hope they all enjoy it.  I remember school, yuck.  Glad I am not in school now.

Pain level is medium, my arm and shoulder is doing alright except when I move it too much, then it kills.  I have done it twice already this afternoon.  I hope not to do it again tonight.  It's raining so no scootering tonight.  Not that I really feel up to it.

Hope you are having a great day and enjoying the holiday.

Sunday, September 6, 2009

A rather boring day.  I took a nap this afternoon for about 2 hours.  I could have slept longer but Mom kept coming in asking when I was planning to wake up.  Not very usual when one is trying to sleep.  She gets so bored and doesn't mean to interrupt.  She no longer likes to be downstairs alone.  So now she is with me everywhere.  She gets so nervous over little things.  It frightens her when she gets hot flashes and she gets them a lot.  They make her cry and freak out.  We go through this at least 2 times a day.  I don't know what to do about it, I don't think there is anything to do about it.  We can't afford to take her to the doctor, I don't think it is anything serious.

Pain level is medium as usual.  My arm and shoulder and the head of course must join them.  I had one student today, Katie.  She is an every other week student.  She is 16 years old and very excited about her new job at the library.  She is excited because she proudly informed me she doesn't need a scholarship for lessons any more.  She can pay me for them.  I didn't mind giving her a scholarship, she works hard and practices and everything.  But she was so proud when she told me she could pay for lessons again.  I gave her a scholarship in April when her father lost his job.  Instead of only having 1 lesson a month, she would have two and the second one would be a scholarship, I would so rather teach a lesson for a student like her then have her have to have even less lessons.

This Saturday, Katie will be coming back to help me pass out more flyers.  Rachel will be helping me too this week.  Remember 18 new students is what I need.  I have 400 more flyers to pass out.

We aren't going for a scooter this evening.  I am feeling real tired so we will be going to bed rather early.  I have to get up early tomorrow for the Muglia's lessons!  I will have 6 lessons tomorrow.  I am excited about that.

Have a great evening.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

I didn't sleep very well last night.  I was up I think for most of it.  I just couldn't sleep, no reason, just couldn't.  Rather annoying to say the least.  I am not as tired as I thought I would be though.  Of course, it is only 1:30 in the afternoon!  

I had one student today, Lily, she is 11 (already!) she takes voice.  She is doing pretty well with it and practices more than when she played the piano.  One of the older girls wants to sing at Christmas with her.  I think that will be neat.  They will sound good together.

It occurred to me last night (when I couldn't sleep) that my older brother, Richard cannot handle my illness.  When I was talking to him he said I sounded "better".  Well, I am not better, I sounded happy, that's all and I was because I was talking to him.  I read a blog this week (a new one for me) pointed out how people want her to be "better" and don't realize that you can sound happy and not be better.  That is Richard in a nutshell.  He wants me to be better.  Maybe someday he will realize this is better and this is what it is going to be.  I have learned to live with my limitations (most of the time!) so he will have to too.

Pain isn't so bad today.  Even my arm is somewhat behaving (for now anyway).  My head is down to its dull roar and so is everything else.  I am not sure if we are going to scooter today or not.  Mom gets overheated so easy and it is sunny out so I don't know if it is a good idea.  She got extra hot yesterday when we went to CVS for our ticket.  We didn't get any numbers.  We will try again for Tuesday.

Tuesday I have to have my blood test, the one I managed to forget about this month.  Because of the blood thinners, I have to have blood tests at least once a month, sometimes more depending on my blood.  I hate blood tests!  They hurt too much.  I did completely forget that I didn't make the appointment for this one.  Silly me, fibro fog!

I am going to pick out a movie for us now.  Or a TV show.  One or the other.  Someday I hope to have a TV in the living room instead of on the kitchen table and we watch from the dining room table.  It gets rather uncomfortable at times.

Have a great day and enjoy the holiday weekend.

Friday, September 4, 2009

I am having a better day than yesterday.  I talked to Richard, the big brother!  It's his 45th birthday!  He he he!  I didn't get to rub it in because he doesn't have a good sense of humor (except when he's doing the teasing!) He sounded good though, I know he is stressed because in a few weeks his temp job will be over and he will be unemployed again.  His kids, Abby and William are in school already!  Apparently they like their new teachers and are happy to see their friends, not happy to be in school, but seeing their friends.  I miss them so much.  Like Richard said, I have too much time on my hands and that makes me miss them even more.  If Richard doesn't find a new job in a few months I will ask him if Mom and I moving in will help.  

I checked the bank account and the deposit DID post, but I am not spending a dime until I know for sure it has gone through.  I hope by next Thursday should be safe.  We have a lot of bills to pay.  Like so many in this country, we are struggling pretty bad.  I have two new students that begin this week and next so that will add some more to our coffers.  I need at least 8 more new ones but would like 18 more new ones.  Then we will have some wiggle room and be able to pay our property taxes for 2009 that we haven't paid yet.

Pain kept me up a lot last night and this morning Mom kept coming in my room and asking me questions so that kept waking me up.  finally at 12:15 she comes in and says didn't I want to be up by noon?  Yeah, that was my cue to get up so I did.  We then went to our usual Tim Horton's for brunch and then grocery shopping.  I have decided that I hate grocery shopping on a budget.  But I did pretty well, 10 days worth of dinners for $40.  Most of the dinners are about $2 total for dinner.  Not bad.  We couldn't get the Healthy Choice dinners because they cost too much, but we got dinners and that is what counts.

I don't think we are going to go out tonight.  I am really tired and Mom is falling asleep next to me.  It is only 4:15 but it feels more like 8 or 9 pm.  

I hope this finds you doing well and having a great day.  It's a holiday weekend!  fortunately, I am teaching all three days so I am a happy camper about all this.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

I am very annoyed today.  The disability check is memo posted.  It may post tonight or tomorrow, but even then it may get sent back to social security because my name is no longer on the checking account.  I had to take it off last Friday because of the Citibank incident.  I spoke to a bank person and they can't tell me when I should be able to pay bills with this money we desperately need.  Anytime, it can be apparently sent back to the treasury.  At that point, it will take 10 days before I get the paper check.  The person's behavior was like, oh well, it isn't a big deal.  Well it is to me.  I have a house payment to pay, a car payment to pay, and other utilities, and oh yeah, the important thing known as food!  She was like, pretend that it is okay.  Sure, take the chance that it is okay.  That could only cause me a charge of $37 + additional fees every time something bounces.  Yeah, like I can afford to take that kind of chance.  Her attitude bugged me the most.  It may not be a big deal to her, but it is a huge deal to us.  Sometimes I envy Mom's memory problem.  She doesn't even remember going to the bank.

I have a big headache from all this.  It's just joining the arm and shoulder.  I know I am not supposed to get so upset because it makes me ache more, but how could I not in this situation.  I just feel like nothing is going right.  Should I throw the towel in and beg Richard to let Mom and I to come and live with him?  I don't know.  I could just scream.  I feel like telling the bank, fine, take the house and everything in it.  Whatever!  I know Mom would be upset about it and I can't take her upset.  I also have not gotten my back disability yet.  It was supposed to come in August, well, it is September now.  I feel very low today, lower than Monday when I had my meltdown.  I don't know what to do now.  As soon as I get my back disability I will be able to file for bankruptcy and then my name can go back on the bank account.  It isn't like Mom can really handle money anymore.  She can barely sign her own name right now.  Not a good situation.

I don't know if we are going out for a scooter or not, depends on pain level.  Right now it is really high.  I just feel powerless right now.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

It's Wednesday!  I feel alright right now.  I picked up my darvacet and finally was able to take one after a week of no pain medication except for Tylenol.  Tylenol doesn't do a whole lot unless you take more than you are supposed, of course I did.

During our usual Tim Horton's visit, we met a young girl named Audra who was lost.  She was supposed to meet some friends, and I think they don't really know how to tell anyone how to get to their house.  Anyway, she asked to borrow my phone because she didn't have one, called them, and from what I could gather, they had no idea that 21 mile rd and mound do not meet because that is where they told her to meet them.  Needless to say, she was lost and so were they.  They told her that there were gas stations on the corner, that is not quite true, that would be at Hall Rd (M-59) and Van Dyke and the railroad tracks are about 1/2 mile west.  So her friend mentioned Walmart and I told Audra we would take her to Walmart.  She hopped in the car and we drove her, of course when we got there, no friends in sight.  She called them again and no answer.  I wasn't going to just drop her off and leave, finally one of the friends called her back on my phone and they were inside the store.  So off we left her.  I hope she will be okay and have a great day.  

It is beautiful out so after 7th Heaven (one of my favorite shows, but not my very favorite - that would be Stargate SG1!) Mom and I will be going scootering!  It is lovely out so we will take the long trail.  Mom usually enjoys it and loves the fresh air.  I hope this weekend isn't too hot because I plan to scooter a lot.  I originally planned to take her to the zoo, but I have to wait until my disability comes in sometime this month.  Not sure when that will happen.  We shall see!

Pain is low right now in the shoulder, but the middle of the top part of my arm it is medium.  My head is better since I took the pain meds.  I hope this finds you doing well and enjoying your day.

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

Had a major breakdown last night before going to bed.  Surprisingly, Mom didn't breakdown too.  I was glad, usually she does and then I have to stuff it back in to make her stop crying.  Didn't have to last night.  I apologized for ruining her credit, raising the amount we owe on the house, and basically financially ruining us.  She doesn't hold anything against me.  I was so upset that my throat hurt from crying so hard.  If we lose the house it is entirely my fault because she put herself in hock to help me buy the store.  Yeah, great move on my part.  A failing business that I thought I could turn around, I could have if the economy hadn't dumped.  Unfortunately, it ultimately doesn't matter, because I did lose the store and I could single handily lose our house.  I know it just things, and being with family is what matters, but it isn't just my things we would be losing, it would be Mom's things too.  I lose other people's stuff, not just my own.  That is what gets me the most, I financially ruined Mom too, not just myself.  I think I could feel better about this whole thing if it was just my stuff.  Not that it matters too much now, it happened and it's over.

Feeling a bit better this morning.  We went to the storage unit and told them when we would be able to catch up on August and September's payments, (because of the Citibank incident), well, we had better be able to pay by the end of the month or they auction off our stuff on October 21.  Great.  Lovely news, nothing like losing everything in the unit.  There are really only a few things in their I want, the rest is going to charity except for the business boxes from the store.  One is Mom's snow globe Richard and I got her from Disney a few years ago for Mother's day.  It is an awesome one.  I also have a few pictures in boxes I would like.  I finally got to sleep around 1am after I had to go downstairs (without Mom - she wouldn't wake up!) to go and get some more Tylenol.  Pain level was really high last night, especially with the breakdown.

Pain level is medium today.  I am going to call Rachel this afternoon and find out when she can come and pass out flyers.  Katie passed out flyers to everyone in the subdivision last night.  I hope I start to get calls soon.  I am trying to be positive about this new plan, but my inner demons of pessimism keeps sneaking out.  Until I lost the store I was an optimist, then I lost the store and went down hill since.  I am working on crawling back up.  Rough climb.

I have one student, Charlie this afternoon.  He plays tenor saxophone.  He practices occasionally, not nearly enough, he should be practicing more.  He will be in Jazz Band this year.  He is almost ready, but not quite.

I hope to go scootering after dinner tonight with Mom.  Have a great day and enjoy the sunshine and nice weather.