Wednesday, May 12, 2010

It's a free day, I mean totally free, with nothing planned to do. Oops, just remembered I got to write mom's doctor appointment in the planner. Be right back! Done! They called while we were at Tim Horton's. I knew she had an appointment coming up, just didn't know when. Fortunately, it is the type of office that calls to confirm the appointment. I like that in a doctor's office. It is just a check up for Mom at the arthritis doctor. She has the same doctor as me. I like her a lot. There isn't a whole lot she can do for me though, I have tried many different medicines and nothing has worked yet. Darvacet does pretty well though. I have given up on trying new medicines, one I can't afford them and two, they often don't work.
Mom's friend, Jose, stopped by for a few minutes. I had called him last Wednesday for help and he wasn't in town. He told me today he isn't often available to help me out with Mom. I will mark him off the help list. At least he told me. Of course, I only call when I am desperate, and so far that has been 2 times in 6 months so it isn't very often. He stayed for about 30 minutes. That is a good amount of time. Mom is in the living room resting. She was falling asleep at the table so I moved her to the living room. She wants to stay there for a while, she says. Hey, no problem, I will be in the dining room working on the blog. Nice apart time for us.

Free days are usually the bane of my existence because there is nothing to do. I do have a couple of books to read, I could watch a movie, right now I am watching Oprah (love Oprah!!!), I think I will make Mom some dinner during the news which is on right after Oprah. I am not hungry since I was hungry a few hours ago so I had a sub. I love subs.

Oprah is very interesting today. It usually is. They are talking about food and women, and God. I totally understand. The author has a new book out, I think I will get the book, maybe it will help me with my weight loss. I think part of the reason I haven't lost a lot of weight, it isn't just about the food, it is about the stuff that I haven't worked out yet or am trying to work out. I know I am not alone, although at times it sure feels like it. I am not the only one with this illness, there are millions of us, yet, at times, I feel like I am the only one who has constant pain. It gets so hard to move at times. On top of that, I am the only one who takes care of Mom. I don't have help and usually that is okay, I can do it. But at times, like last Wednesday, I need help and I don't really have any. On a bad day for both of us, I need help. I don't really have anyone I can call for help. I have some numbers now. I can message my friend, Stacey, and I can call Tillie. I know both will help or come and stay with Mom because they have told me I can. I also can call the young girl down the street, although, I did call last week and didn't hear from her. I didn't really care on Thursday, but it would have been good for me to have someone watch Mom for me so I can do something away from her. I will try again in a few weeks.

Tomorrow we will be busy again. I think tonight we will go and get this book and read it. It sounds like a very good book. I would like to lose all my weight, maybe some of the pain would go with it. I do know not all of the pain will go away, I have lost (and gained) a lot of weight before and the pain was still there. I am not expecting a miracle on that, but it would help me avoid other problems I could get. That is my goal. I try to eat right, (even though I eat frozen dinners - they are the lean cuisine and smart ones) and I try to eat fresh veggies when I can. Fruit does a number on my stomach so I don't eat much fruit. I have tried almost every diet out there, maybe there is something in the book that will help me be able to finally shed the extra weight. I am tired of being fat. I am tired of doctors look at me and telling me the weight is going the wrong direction. It gets very discouraging. Very very discouraging.

It isn't really sunny out, it is cold and dreary. Not nice weather at all, fits my mood I suppose. It is supposed to rain all day tomorrow. Ugh, not happy on that. Oh well, we have a busy day tomorrow no matter what. We don't have a choice to go to the doctors, we have to go. Both of us are going to get blood tests first thing in the morning, then Mom's Arthritis appointment, then off to knitting with my friend (a piano lesson thrown in the knitting session too). I hope you are having a good day.

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