Sunday, November 28, 2010

Sunday 11-28

I had lunch with Kathy today.  It was fun.  We went to one of our usuals, Red Lobster for their soup and salad combo.  It is so yummy.  Fresh shrimp on the salad, romaine lettuce (I can't eat the iceberg so I always ask for no iceberg lettuce on all my salads), cucumbers, what can I say?  The soup in a bread bowl! Yeah, just simply scrumptious!  Kathy and I always end up getting the same thing, rather weird how we have always done that, but we do.  Almost everywhere we go we get the same thing most times.  We have very similar tastes!  We do like a lot of the same things.  After lunch we went to Walmart's. I now have most of my shopping done!  Yup, I am rather glad about that.  I just have 3 more things to buy and I am done.  Richard, Jennifer and 1 more and that is it.  I also picked up a gravy boat.  Ours died many years ago unfortunately, now I have one.  I am actually very thrilled about it.  It was $5 and it is white so it goes with any set of dishes.  I don't like using measuring cups for gravy.  It is just tacky, but when you don't have a gravy boat, what can you do?  Not much, that is for sure but now I have one and that is great!

I am working on copying the rest of the paperwork for  the lawyer for the bankruptcy.  I can't wait to get this over with.  This will be the last of the remnants of the store stuff.  A new beginning with better results, I hope.  I have someone coming with me so that I have another set of ears listening to what I am being told and the answers to my questions.  I have ever so many in my head that I hope I remember them all.  I have a friend who has a few too.  I am thankful for that.

I was really missing Mom last night after everyone left.  I had a few tears because I was alone again.  Not so many tears today, almost in the car with Kathy, but I held them back after a few seconds.  I am trying to find my purpose in life now that Mom is gone.  I loved taking care of her, I really did.  I lived for that at times.  I felt important and now I don't feel so important.  Actually, I don't feel important at all right now.  I haven't since I finished taking care of stuff for Mom.  The hours that I teach I feel purposeful, but not the rest of the day, then I feel unimportant and no purpose.  I don't like this feeling.  I have to find a new purpose for the rest of my day, but I haven't yet.  It is very slow progress.  Sometimes I feel like I make some, then I feel I haven't made any.  I do hope that soon I will feel like I have made much progress and find a new purpose in life because right now, I don't feel like I have one right now.

Pain level is a bit high this afternoon for my headache this afternoon.  My neck is a bit stiff too for some odd reason.  I don't usually have a neck ache but I do today.  I think I am just stressed.  I hope your day is better.

2 comments:

  1. The body takes stress on in many ways. Sounds like you have lots of stress with all your aches and pains everywhere!!! Slow down and rest.

    I went through the same period after my mom died. I was her caregiver for everything....right down to her medications. Then when she was gone, I didn't have that responsibility anymore and it made me very sad. I even cried over her pill box I had just filled the week she had died. It's so hard and you will tear up. I still do. Your mother will always be with you, as mine will be with me. If I think like that, it gets mre through one more day.

    God bless, my friend!
    Missy

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  2. Fibro and Stress are water and oil to me lol Any lil stess to my body and muscle spasms start in my lower back and shoulders. When I lost my grandfather last year the stress took about four months of energy away from me. I was thinking the same way lol I was thinking that I didn't have any purpose in life but my faith and the hard work my grandfather did for me give me hope. The Lord and your mom will guide you to happiness soon.

    My blessings are always shared with God's Children......
    Jamellia

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