Thursday, February 27, 2014

Almost March!!!

I can't believe that it is almost March!  I managed to be very careful with my money this month and I have almost paid allllll of the property taxes for 2012 off.  I am just under $100 short so that is good.  It proved to me a few things that I am glad about.

Anyways, last weekend was competition.  Boy, am I glad that is over.  It is a very exhausting weekend for me, very exhausting.  My 6 students who went did very well.  I am proud of them.  They all played and sang their best.  I do have one who is very unhappy with her results.  She and I will be speaking about it at her lesson tomorrow.  Basically, she wanted first in everything and was very unhappy with 2nds and 3rds.  She did get 1 first place in the duet category, but that was it.  I am most unhappy that she is not happy as she didn't really practice that much this year.  She coasted on her natural talent and well, this is the results she got.  If you want first place, practice.  Bottom line.  That is just the way it is.  Competition is hard and you have to work hard to get the results so she and I will be discussing this tomorrow.

I did pretty okay as far as pain went except for Sunday morning.  That was terrible.  My head was so bad it was unbelievable.  I had such a migraine.  It was better by the afternoon.  I think it was because I didn't have much sleep Friday night and same with Saturday night.  I was on the go so much too.  There really was no time to rest and I really need the time to rest.  It is hard to fit it in and I will have to do much better next year.  For now, I am working on recovering from it.  I have been sleeping an extraordinary amount (with the usual wake ups, of course).  Tuesday night I slept 16 hours.  Sunday night I slept for about 14 hours.  I am a 12 hour sleeper to begin with so I was just so exhausted.  Monday night, I went to tea with Star and we had a good time.  We are going to work on Budgets together.  I am proud of how I am doing with keeping up with the bills and not foolishly spending so much money.  I don't use my credit cards very much and they will be going back into the safe.  I only brought one at competition because I might have needed it in emergency but I didn't so back it goes.  Overall, I am a happy camper with how I am doing.  Star is doing pretty well too.  Our downfalls are books though.  That is our downfalls.  I am doing better as I remind myself that I have several books on my nook that I have not read yet so that helps.  I am re-reading one of my favorite series right now too. I went through and re-read all my Anne of Green Gables books.  I love Anne.  She is my all time favorite character.  I just love her and her daughter, Rilla.  Rilla is my second all time favorite character.  After them is Harry Potter and crew.  I love those books too.  I do not have them for my nook yet.  I do not plan to get them anytime soon as I have them all in book form so I do not need them in e-book form.

Maisy is sitting next to me sleeping.  She came with me to run a couple of errands.  I had to go to the bank and the post office.  I could have left the envelope that I needed to mail in my mailbox, but I didn't want to since it was the property tax check so I dropped it off directly at the post office.  We also went to the bank where she got 2, yes 2, treats.  Then we headed to McDonald's for my diet coke, which I am doing horrible on giving up.  After that, we stopped at Tim Horton's for my bagel since we are out of them here at home.  Tonight I am going to the store after Isaac's lesson and getting some bagels, CDs, my prescription, and some magnesium since I am out of it.  I have been meaning to do this all week, but I just didn't want to go out into the cold and get it.  I will tonight though plus I got to take Maisy with me so I didn't want to stop anywhere where she had to sit in the car.  It is just too cold for her to do that.  I only take her with me when I am not getting out of the car like earlier today.  Tonight, I will not be taking the lovely young lady doggie with me.  She will have to stay home with her Mama instead of coming with her Aunt.  I am her Aunt and the other Heather, Heather BT is her Mama.  It works out quite well.

Oh my gosh!  Maisy was such a little ninja yesterday!!!!  So, Acer left his chair out instead of pushing it in when he ran upstairs.  Well, he had food at his place on the table.  Maisy jumped up on Acer's chair and began eating the snack of Acer's.  She continued to eat as Acer came back down, but immediately jumped down when her Mama came up the stairs.  Maisy then ran to me since she was in trouble.  Yup, the ninjaness of Maisy.  One must ALWAYS push one's chair in at the dining room table since she can and will jump up to get food.  She once ate most of my dinner by someone leaving their chair out too.

My headache is a bit sorer than usual right now.  I think it is the anxiety from the weekend leaving my body that is the cause of it.  I had very high anxiety all weekend long.  I expected this.  I usually do during competition.  It takes days to lower the anxiety to the regular amount and with it comes a worse than usual headache.  I am glad that I have had much time to sleep and rest/relax this week.  I plan to take a wee nap before Isaac's lesson.  I am getting a bit overtired again.  I will, again head to bed early tonight.  I don't have to get up early tomorrow so that is good, I can sleep in as much as needed if necessary.  I am just tired of being exhausted all the time and headache and anxious and fibroy.  You know, the works.  I think it gets to all of us every so often.

Well, off to a nap!

Saturday, February 15, 2014

A Warm up?

It is a bit warmer today than it has been, not a complete warm up, like supposedly next week, but enough of one that I was glad about.

Maisy and I did some errands this afternoon.  She is such a funny dog.  I just love her.  We did have to drop off some Christmas presents to my friend, Julie, for her children, Emily and Lily.  I know, it is 2 months past Christmas so I am a bit late.  Whoops.  I have been meaning to drop them off but just haven't caught up to Julie to be able to do that so today, I just dropped them off at her work.  She works at a tax office so I figured she would be busy, so I didn't plan to stay.  It was a good thing.  I brought Maisy in because I couldn't leave her in the car, it wasn't that warm plus I HATE leaving her in the car. If I have to leave her in the car, she just has to stay home.  That is how it works.

Today my one lesson was cancelled so it HAS been an all day Maisy and me day without any lessons.  I have 2 tomorrow.  My two little boys are coming tomorrow instead of last Friday.  I am not sure why, but that is okay.  It works.  Next week there will not be any lessons Friday or Saturday as I will be at competition all weekend long.  I just remembered I needed to get Nick new books.  I called the usual place but they are closed, I called another place that is also nearby, they are closed but they still answered the phone.  They are holding them for me at the front desk.  Oh, thank goodness!  I can't believe I totally forgot.  What can I say?  I will have them in time and that is what matters.

Everyone is home now and dinner is in the oven.  I am not that hungry right now but I probably will be when dinner is ready.  We are having chicken Alfredo.  I like it.  It is from Costco.  The kids like it a lot too.

I have been having sleeping issues again.  I mean, more than usual.  My right leg is so sore at night by morning but I feel like I haven't slept at all some mornings.  I know I have but not much.  I slept for about an hour this afternoon although it felt like I didn't sleep at all.  Right after was when Maisy and I went delivering the presents.  I had a nightmare last night that I had the vasculitis again.  I hope to never have that one again.  It is awful, simply awful.  I would have to say it hurt (when peaking) worse than the worst fibro flare, biggest headache, blood clot, or stomach ache ever.  It was so bad.  I don't know why I have been having flashbacks to it lately but I have.  I sure hope it isn't of things to come.  Ugh, that would just awful.  It is definitely something no one wants nor do I ever want it again.

I am more tired than usual today, I think mainly due to my sleep issues this week.  I also felt like I was coming down with a cold but now I think it is going away.  I sure hope so.  I often get a cold when the weather warms up rather than when the weather cools down.  It is strange, I know.  My head doesn't feel as stuffy as it did a couple of days ago, but I still don't feel 100% well either.  I figure by the time competition comes around next weekend, I should be feeling much better.

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Decisions and Doggies

A few days ago I was agonizing over some decisions that needed to be made.  Well, I have made them.  I feel much better about it all.  I know what I am going to do and it will help me a lot.  My anxiety has lowered about it too so I know this is the right decision.

I have also realized the benefit of having an animal in my life.  With the introduction to living full time with Maisy and Q, I have decided that as long as I can help it, I will not be dogless again.  I love Maisy so much.  She is such a good little dog and such a pal.  We play together and we snuggle together.  She sits next to me when I am on face book.  I love how she splits her time between Heather BT and I during the day and evening.  It is a wonderful thing.  I never knew how much love I had for such a little, 18 pound furry creature but I sure do.  She is awesome.  I have learned so much just by helping to take care of her.  I also like cats but I have students who allergic and not too mention housemates who are allergic to them so no cats and that is okay.  We have 2 dogs, Calli's guide dog and Maisy.  That is all we need right now.

Sunday, February 9, 2014

Sunday!

I am sitting here in my pajamys and loving every minute of it.  I am very tired today.  It is definitely a day of rest.  Maisy is sitting next to me.  Every so often, I pet her and rub her tummy (she loves this a lot).  I got up at about 2 pm today.  I had planned on going to the bookstore with Star but she is exhausted and in the middle of a flare and I am so exhausted so we will go another day.  It is just weird because we go almost every week and this past week we didn't go at all!  It is okay.  I talk to her by text almost every night.  I also talked to Kathy today, so that was even better!  It has been a quiet week.  I had one new student and one student quit.  That balances each other out a bit, although the student who quit was a 45 minute lesson and the new is 30 but all in all in works.  I have another new one this week too.  I usually have just enough to help pay the bills so that is good.

Right now I am also watching the men's skating in the Olympics.  I am glad that they are showing more than just the Americans.  I just saw an Italian skater.  He did really well.  The American, Jason Brown is on right now, and he is doing well.  The music is beautiful too.  It is Irish or Celtic.  One of the two but it is lovely.

Painwise, this week has been up and down.  I am working on giving up diet coke but I had such a bad headache on Wednesday that Bill bought both Heather BT and I pop because we were both dealing with the caffeine headache of giving up pop.  I had a small one yesterday because of the same reason.  I figure that after a few weeks I won't need one anymore and then, i will be diet coke free!  That is the goal, anyway!  I haven't had too much of any flares this week, which is good, but my friend, Star, sure has.  She is in the midst of one right now.  We were tentatively planning to go to tea today but neither of us is really up to it.  Her insomnia and flare are throwing her for a loop and my exhaustion is throwing me for one too.  We will go later in the week.  It is just weird to miss a week since we have been going weekly for a long time now.  It has been just way too cold to go this past week.  I hope this next week is nice and not so snowy or cold.  I am tired of both already.

Well, my mind is totally on the Olympics now so off I go to watch them.  I love watching the skating so much!

Monday, February 3, 2014

so much to say and I don't know how to say it

It has been a painful couple of days both emotionally and physically.  I don't know that when I am upset, my physical pain goes right along with it and boy, has it.  I have a headache today but the body aches are bad.  I didn't get up until 2 pm.  My legs were so sore at that point so I looked at my clock and no wonder, it was 2 in the afternoon!  So I got up and ready for the day.

I have 3 lessons for the day of which I am very thankful.  Lessons make my day so much better.

I have been thinking about happiness and how we go about getting it.  I am basically a happy person.  Yes, I was upset and grieving deeply when my mother died, I grieved deep and very hard.  It took a few years before I was better about it.  I will say that I have days where I still grieve deeply for her.  I miss her all the time and everything reminds me of her.  Since we were together all the time for the last several years of her life, how could things not remind me of her?  We were always together.  I brought her everywhere with me.  It was just better that way.  Anyways, I am basically a happy person.  I don't believe another person can make you happy but I do believe that they can add and subtract from your happiness.  I think it is a choice, at times, to be happy.  Yes, I also believe that there are many things around you that influence your choice of whether to be happy or sad.  Right now I have some decisions that need to be made and they are hard ones but they need to be made.  That is difficult for me because I have a hard time with conflict.  I generally will do anything to avoid conflict but this is getting to me and I have to do this.  I need prayers with this.  I also need the words of what to say.  It is important to me that I say these things right and not angrily or hurtful.

Saturday, February 1, 2014

the snow begins again in February!

It is the first day of February and it is snowing a lot again.  We are supposed to be getting about 6 or so inches of snow when all is said and done along with some possible rain.  Yeah, rain.  On top of the snow.  Everyone is home now.  Bill is out snow blowing the snow and Acer is about to practice piano.  Heather BT and Calli just arrived home too.  Maisy and I have been holding down the fort for the day.  I love our days together, the Maisy girl and I.  She is such a good little doggie.  We snuggled together this morning in my room and then sat next to each other here in the music room at the computer.  She is a very good companion.

Surprisingly, I am not aching as much as I expected today with the weather and all.  I do have a bit more of a headache than usual, which I expected, but other than that, it is just the regular aches and pains.  I am surprised about that.  I expected more aches and pain in this damp, cold weather.  It is a happy surprise though and I am not complaining!  I am more tired than usual, which I expected because of the weather.  I may be heading for a nap shortly, not that that is unusual for a Saturday afternoon.  Often, by the time Saturday rolls around I am very tired and need to catch up on my sleep.

All 3 of my lessons cancelled today.  I was very disappointed.  Megan is going to make hers up though tomorrow so I am really glad about that.  I also have Becca's lesson tomorrow, which makes me very happy too so all in all, it isn't a horrible weekend as far as lessons go unless the weather gets bad tomorrow and they all cancel again.  According to the weather forecast, it is supposed to be warmer tomorrow and no rain or snow.  I am glad about that.  I am hoping for another make up with Ally tomorrow too.  I have messaged her mom so we shall see what her schedule is like for the day.  I know they are very busy.

I hope that this month's weather is much better than last months, that is for sure!

Competition is in 3 weeks now.  I am getting rather nervous for some of my students.  Sarah H is perfectly ready.  Acer helped her with the one place she races and she will be working on it this week.  The duet is what I am most worried about.  Both know their parts but have not practiced enough together.  I am hoping that they will get together this week.  It is in 3 weeks!  Acer is, of course, very ready.  Isabella is almost completely ready as well as Sammy.  Sammy is ready so that is good.  I have 6 going this year.  I had hoped for more but that is okay.  Whoever wants to go is fine with me.  The only thing I expect is for you to practice and do your best, which I must say that my students do do.  They do work and practice for competition.  I am not quite ready as my job is almost done.  I was to get the pianos this year.  My job won't be complete until competition because that is when the pianos will be delivered.  I also work at the awards ceremony too.  I double check the names with the trophies that the students come down the stairs with.  I sit in my little scooter and that is what I do.  It should be an interesting weekend.  It always is.  My kids usually do pretty well so we shall see what happens this year.

Well, I am seriously thinking that a nap may be in order soon.  I am tired but not super tired but tired enough for a nap.